Our very un-wedding wedding

04.04.2020

5 weeks ago I was shopping with my Aunty in Edinburgh, drinking prosecco and choosing the perfume I would wear on my wedding day. 4 weeks ago my partner, Phil, and I met with the wedding Co-ordinator to walk through the big day- every minute from when we arrived at the hotel, to when we left the following day. Phil and I left feeling organised, calm and prepared. The final countdown was on! Table plan was written, final favours were finished, packing list was complete. 

Then the pandemic picked up pace, and everything unravelled very quickly.

We clung on to optimism until the last possible moment, hoping our wedding could still go ahead. And then again, once it couldn't, we clung on to the hope that we could still get married just the two of us with Tim our Humanist, until we couldn't. Lock down was the final realisation that the date '04.04.2020' that has been in our minds the last 16 months, and that was engraved/ written on absolutely everything to do with the wedding..wasn't going to be the day we hoped. 

The final week countdown was a difficult one. The week that should have been filled with excitement was filled with complete mixed emotions. Messages of support from family and friends- we didn't know what to say. Should we make a plan? Should we just watch films all day? Should we celebrate? What happens if we feel too sad to celebrate? It is a completely surreal experience because these emotions are encased in guilt for even feeling sad- there is a much bigger picture out there, and really, getting married isn't that important- not compared to the health of those around us. But when you are in lock down with limited distractions and the date looming- it is hard not to feel emotion surrounding the date. 

So we made a plan. Get up, morning walk the 2 of us, ordered a fancy take away meal from a local restaurant, and put a bottle of Champagne in the fridge. Best case scenario, we would have a lovely romantic day together, and worst case scenario if we felt too overwhelmed/ sad/ emotional, we would just drink the alcohol and watch lots of films together. 

We messaged our friends the day before, to say that if they had a drink for us or fancied listening to Ray La Montagne (our first dance song) and dancing in their own living room, they should send us a selfie or video of them doing it (highly recommend doing this!!!)

Saturday 4th arrived. I had channelled my emotions the week before into writing my first poem! (no judgement of the actual quality of the poem allowed) So kick started the day by reading this out to Phil. 

After a leisurely start to the day, we opened the door and friends had left a bottle of Champagne on our doorstep, emotional moment number 2 of the day. 

We set off on our walk, and focused our chat on reminiscing about all of the adventures and holidays we have had in the 11 year since knowing each other- this took quite a while and was an incredibly fun way to pass the time whilst walking. 

 We passed some time playing on the Wii on Saturday afternoon (the wedding blackboard had been erased to make a game leaderboard), and then went upstairs to get ready. 

Throughout the day, we got messages, cards, selfies, and some incredible dance videos from some of our fabulous family and friends. We watched them all together and read them out loud. It really made us feel so lucky to have such fantastic friends, and we felt happy, and very much in love and ready to celebrate. So we decided to go big, and put on our wedding gear. Why not? It just means I get to wear this beautiful dress twice and the first time- it's just for us. 

I shouted down the stairs that I was ready, and Phil waited in the living room. He put on the song that I will walk down the aisle to, and I walked down the stairs into our living room. I can't really put into words how we felt when I walked into the room. You can use your imagination. 

Tim our Humanist encouraged us to write our own ceremony, so it was no difficulty going through it ourselves on the day. We read our story, vows, and then listened to friends readings and songs (we requested them to send these through to us before hand!). By playing these through the speaker, we were fully able to absorb the lyrics whilst looking only at each other. No-one else around. 

We decided to exchange rings today too, because to us, a ring is a sign of our commitment to one another, and we felt it was right to start our 'emotionally married' life from today.

It was then time for Champagne! We danced, drank, in the house and in the garden. Neighbours popped their heads over the fence to wish us well. Our meal arrived. Bottle number 2 was opened. The wedding spotify playlist was on. All thoughts of forgetting the day through a film were forgotten. It was just the 2 of us, on our home dance floor, dancing the night away. 

Sunday morning we woke with sore heads and big grins on our faces. I spent the morning re-reading and watching all of the messages from friends, it really had felt like a wedding!

So that's our little love story. Part 1. And now we get to have 2 celebrations, and 2 anniversaries. How great is that?!

I have now turned my thoughts towards other friends due to be getting married this year. It all happened so quickly before ours, it felt like a big shock, but others who's are later in the year have longer to ponder the uncertainty and decide what to do. 

To those people- I would like to use that annoying quote that the kids all use these days. 

"You do you"

If you want to ignore the day- turn off your phones, watch films and just snuggle on the sofa and appreciate having each other. 

If you want to get married the 2 of you (law allowing), then go for it- the party can come later. 

And if it goes ahead- then don't sweat the small stuff and just enjoy it. All of those tiny details I was fretting about seem completely irrelevant now, I won't make the same mistake again when the party does come around. 

Thanks for reading and I wish you well if you are in the midst of wedding- worry. And to finish, I will leave this quote that a friend sent to me this week.

"When you are in the middle of a story, it isn't a story at all, but only a confusion; a dark roaring, a blindness, a wreckage of shattered glass and splintered wood; like a house in a whirlwind, or else a boat crushed by the icebergs or swept over rapids, and all aboard are powerless to stop it. It's only afterwards that it becomes anything like a story at all. When you are telling it, to yourself, or to someone else."- Margaret Atwood.

...and what a story this will be to tell :) 

The time I broke my collarbone

So 5 weeks out from Berlin Marathon I broke my collarbone.

My X Ray- lots of smaller shards that didn't show up on this photo

Day 1: At least the birthday present Dryrobe was getting use for something!

 First of all my lovely road bike (first ever nice bike purchase, the one I did my Ironman on) got stolen on the Monday, and on Wednesday, when I was tootling to work on my trusty cyclocross bike, leisurely pace, trainers on not clipped in. I hit a pothole, I think), went flying, and shattered my collarbone into more than 4 pieces.I have never broken a bone before, or had a setback like this. 21st August 2019- absolutely devastated.

I have found the journey to recovery a roller coaster to say the least, going from around 12 hours exercise a week, working full time, socialising a lot and being an all round busy bee, to doing nothing and feeling completely helpless. So here's a snapshot of my road to recovery. I'm writing this largely as a cathartic diary and to acknowledge my lovely support network. But I also hope that it can help other sporty people that get injured feel like they are not alone, as I found reading blogs like this particularly helpful to motivate me in the early stages.

 Week 1 passed in a total blur. Lots of codeine, ice, hot water bottles, Netflix and lying down. No time for boredom because I slept a lot and felt tired and sore. Thank you friends and family for all of the flowers, chocolates and well wishes during this time. I felt loved and valued and that played a huge part in keeping me out of the hole of despair. During the latter half of the week, I tried spinning my legs on the turbo to initiate some endorphins and get my blood pumping. I felt amazing when I did this. But the week consisted largely of trying to be kind to myself. Slept the whole week on the sofa as I could only get comfy in 1 position and couldn't fully lie down. 

Week 2 I managed to build up from a couple of walks, to a walk that involved 3 minutes of snail paced jogging. The sun was shining and I felt insanely happy and full of gratitude during this time. Taking in the views, the weather, celebrating my amazing body starting to heal (more energy now as off the codeine and onto paracetamol). Seeing my best girlfriends this week at Sarah's hen do was great for my mental well being, got out of the house, had a glass of wine, and even managed a little dancing. I was exhausted the next day but it was totally worth it. 

 


Week 3 involved a few more highs and lows. I managed some more regular turbos, a 10km run that made me absolutely high on life (followed by lots of resting and icing). This week was also when I think I started to process the accident, felt frustrated that I couldn't remember what happened, sad I had such limited movement with my arm, guilty that I was off work, and a bit lonely. I think this was as my body increased in energy and I was able to jog, I was impatient to get back to full function. Be kind to yourself. My motto of the week. It's OK not to be OK. The Calm app and Mugwort tea (thanks for the recommendation Giulia) were my main coping strategies this week.

Trying out some leg exercise as suggested by my fab brother (PT in Newcastle) 

Quote from the Calm app- my saving grace

Chatting to my brother finding exercises I could do

As soon as I felt a bit more energetic I tried to do too much and set myself back. I hadn't realised how much my mental health had taken a battering being at home, isolated from my friends and colleagues, and lacking my usual routine and endorphins of exercise. I paid my first visit into work and found it completely overwhelming. People were kind and just asking how I was, but it was all too much and I ended up walking around the block, hysterical, having a full blown panic attack. All it took was one small comment about 'If I was back running then I should be back at work' to make my self doubt rise to full force and waves of anxious, low thoughts were overwhelming. Thanks to Ian my friend and colleague for walking beside me during this time,and to my friends and cheerleaders through life who were at the other end of the phone. 

This guilt for being off work, being able to run, fear of judgement amalgamated this week and I really struggled with the balance between looking after myself, and caring what other people think. A wise friend said 'only care about the opinions of people you care about'- my mantra going into week 4. 

Selfie sent to close friends- thank goodness for them.

Week 4 started with a confidence boosting Consultant appointment at the hospital who reassured me that it was absolutely fine to run, running stimulated blood flow and light impact- both really positive things for bone growth, as long as it didn't cause me pain. He also reassured me that mental is as important as physical health, and it was fine to take another couple of weeks off to get myself in order. The physio reinforced this, and said I am recovering twice as quickly as the average person. After last week, these were great things for me to hear. I think the jogging, regular physio, and good food (thanks Sarah O- Thryve Nutrition) for the tips and advice on what foods to eat to promote healthy bones. Thank you also for coming on all of the slow hill runs and walking with me through my tears of impatience. You really are one of a kind. I managed 2 half marathon distances this week with no pain, and my anxiety was reducing as I was able to run more- causing less physical pain too as relaxing whilst running loosened the knots in my back and tightness in my chest (that had been irritating my collarbone). 

Lovely jog with Nicky- my running inspiration

Eventually getting into the hills- it is hard to get perspective from the ground

Always chasing the views with Nadine- my runner soul sister

First run without a sling- a few laughs, a few tears, good for building my confidence thank you Sarah.

Week 5 was a funny one. I started to consider the Marathon again, and felt inspired by my friend Nicky who gave me strength to believe that I could at least start it with no expectations, and can drop out if I needed to. My anxiety had been really bad this past week since going into work, so I wanted to try and make myself socialise a bit more, as I think it was worse when in the house on my own. So I made myself a t-shirt highlighting my broken collarbone, and went to Park Run. What a confidence boost this was!! I was OK, people gave me lots of space, were very supportive, and I got to see my friends. I started to feel the clouds lift. The latter half of this week was somewhat more difficult, as one of my running friends had commited suicide and their funeral was this week. It made me frustrated that there is still such a stigma around mental health, having felt misunderstood and isolated during this period of recovery as I was physically looking well, smiling and getting outside, some people that don't know me as well were quick to judge. I felt pretty motivated to go and run this marathon now. And to celebrate all of the things I can do rather than focusing on the things I can't. Life is too short. I am not sure if anyone is reading this and feeling cynical, but if you are, I am aware that a collarbone break isn't that bad, and could have been way worse, but when in the depths of a low mood- it can be hard to see the sunshine even though you know it is there. 

When Life gives you lemons...make lemonade. Inspired by Lucy Gossage.

Anxious thoughts can be put in perspective when with a good friend.

Bought the gear... now I HAD to finish it

5 weeks and 4 days after the break... I RAN BERLIN MARATHON!!!! I didn't just run it, I ran it in 3 hours and 38 minutes and 14 seconds. A PB by about 30 seconds! I felt relaxed, I smiled the WHOLE way round, I thought about my friend who's funeral I had been to, and those friends and family that have supported me through this injury and I enjoyed every minute of it. I wore my t-shirt again, and people were really respectful and ran around me without bumping into me. I stopped to walk and stretch my arm and back every 15 minutes. I cried my wee eyes out over the finish line. I CAN do it. It WAS good for me. I will be OK. 

 
 

I am still not quite there mentally, as you will know if you get anxious thoughts or low moods, they don't just disappear, but running is my therapy. And so are my friends and family. I am on phased return back to work now and want people to know why I took my time coming back. I go through phases of feeling embarassed, like I have failed, like I should be stronger and just 'get a grip', and then I remember to be kind to myself. And we should talk about mental health. Because it's important. 

So thank you. Thanks for reading to the end of this blog (likely just my closest family and friends who knew it all anyway). Thanks to Cat and Emma for being my absolute cheerleaders. To Claire, Dad and Matthew for all of the voice notes and messages of encouragement. To Nicky, Sarah O, Nadine and Myrah for running with me or driving me to a scenic run spot when I needed the support and to get out of the house. To Lizi for the facetime calls from across the world. To Heather and Jim for coming round with emergency meals. To mum for coming to Berlin with me and being my rock.To all of my other friends and family who have been patient, understanding and supportive every step. I love you all and I have appreciated it all. I know I still have a long road of recovery ahead but it is that bit brighter knowing I have you all walking it with me too :) 

Finally a tiny soppy shout out to Phil. Getting married in 6 months, and if this wasn't a test to see if we were meant to be then I don't know what would be. Unable to do anything for myself, I have been low, emotional, unable to give Phil the companionship that he deserves and he has been calm, patient, given me a hug when I needed to cry, cooked me lovely meals and never judged. And I have been hard work I can tell you. Phil- I am one lucky lady and I am so glad I get to spend my life with you (hopefully with no more broken bones!). Thank you x

Love my motivational jewellry from Momentum Jewellry- Thanks Emelie for that, and Danni and Claire for my other get well bracelets- they powered me through the race!

Thinking about doing your first triathlon?

I am not sure if there is something in the air as my peer group is approaching 30, but a few friends have started considering a triathlon and are a bit daunted by it all, as I was 3 years ago (and still am!). So friends and fellow aspiring athletes- this is for you, I hope you find it useful. 

My triathlon journey has been over the past 3 years and I have gone from coming 13th from last in a local sprint triathlon, to completing an Ironman and qualifying for GB in Middle distance. I have learnt a lot along the way that I wish I had known before racing. Here are a few basics. 

Which triathlon?

Familarise yourself with the distances. Courses vary slightly but a rough guide is below. I had an OK basic level of fitness so went for a sprint rather than a novice as my first triathlon. If you can swim a little bit (even if breaststroke), and can jog a park run, you can do a sprint. I wouldn't recommend going straight in at one of the longer races, just because of the complexity of transition etc. It is good to do a shorter one, take your time and just get through it. However there is no reason why this couldn't be followed by a longer race in the same year!

Triathlon	Swim (metres)	Bike (km)	Run (km)
Novice	400	10	2.5
Sprint	750	20	5
Standard/Olympic	1500	40	10
Middle/Half Ironman	1900	90	13.1 (half marathon)
Full/ Long/ Ironman	3900	180	42 (a marathon)

Secondly, think about whether you want the stress of an open water swim as your first tri. I felt like I had enough to think about, and most sprint triathlons tend to be pool based, so I opted for one of those. The Border Series Triathlons are a great place to start for people living in Scotland or North England. They are friendly and social with a wide range of abilities. You have 5 or 6 races to choose from. I still go back and do these as training races now.

If you want to jump straight in at the deep end with an Open Water (OW) swim, you will need to look around as the shorter distances don't have many. Loch Ore Sprint is one of the few I have done. 

How do I go about training?

Do some reading. Either online or get some inspiring triathlon books. I am a big fan of Chrissie Wellington's books, both 'A Life Without Limits' (about her journey into triathlon), and 'To the finish line' (contains advice on training plans and nutrition). I also like Don Fink's Ironman books. His are more practical with training plans. I have tonnes of books so any friends living close by- just borrow mine :) 

Join a club. This is useful for sharing ideas, motivation during winter months, and advice on new purchases (be warned- triathlon is an expensive sport!). Winter is a good time to join, as sessions are mainly pool based and on spin bikes, so your ability doesn't matter. 

Start swimming, cycling and running. If the above 2 don't suit you, ultimately, you just need to make time to swim, cycle and run once a week to get round a sprint triathlon. You can go from there and add in sessions if you feel you are able to and want to. 

Swimming can get repetitive if you just count the lengths, so if you aren't with a club it is worth downloading some sessions online to help you develop. Equally, if you are a member of a gym, the laminated instruction cards most of them have are great. 

Cycling can be a 1 hour loop, or a commute to work, or a cycle to a friends house. You should be able to cycle for abut an hour for a sprint, and then, again, build it up as you decide which distances you want to go for. Including some hills can also help build strength. 

Unflattering winter commute to work look

Running in all weathers

Park run is a great way to get comfortable with a 5k. If you haven't tried one, what are you waiting for they are AMAZING! Search for your local one and get yourself down there. Make sure you print off a barcode ;)

Brick sessions are the last thing I didn't do for my first triathlon, and still am not very good at incorporating them. This is usually a cycle, followed by a short run so that your muscle groups get used to the change between discipline. Give one a go!

All the gear no idea

If you aren't going for first place on your first tri, don't worry about getting all of the gear. I used my big heavy commuter bike for my first tri, indoor swim meant I didn't need a wetsuit, and invested in a really basic cheap tri suit from Wiggle , which is an amazing website with reasonably priced gear. The tri suit meant I didn't have to worry about changing clothes so was a worthy investment. The other option would be to swim in a swimming costume then put  shorts on top. It is an option but might chaff on the bike and run (if you are doing that- don’t fear- just buy chamois cream from a cycle shop and lube up lots before you start!)

I would learn how to change an inner tube if you can't already. You would be disappointed if you got a puncture during your first race and couldn't finish it. Lots of bike shops do free maintenance classes so look into one of those.

The night before

Timings. Set your alarm nice and early and plan how you will get there and load your car (practice removing the front wheel if you need to do that!)

Lie out all of your stuff and run through a checklist. 

• Trisuit/ swimming costume
• Swim cap (most races give you one but some don't)
• Nose peg if you use one
• Handtowel
• Clip on shoes if you use them
• Socks
• Talc Powder
• Number Belt (super cheap from shops like Decathlon)
• Cycle jacket (even if you think it will be warm, I wasn't prepared for my first one and had to borrow from a nice lady next to me!)
• Cycle gloves (if early season race)
• Helmet
• Sunglasses
• Running trainers
• Suncream 
• Lube for chaffing (I use bodyglide for around wetsuit line, and Chamois cream for cycle chaff areas!)
• Flip flops or old trainers (to wear at start)
• Warm stuff for after
• Breakfast bar for 1h pre-race 
• Energy gels for race (or whatever you decide to use). I use High 5

Check the forecast. It is worth looking at what weather will be like. Some races let you put your stuff in a bag or box if it’s forecast to rain, but others don’t. I usually take a plastic bag just in case. 

Long hair plan.  Usually I tie hair up for swimming, which is a real pain putting a helmet on as it creates a bump and later a headache, so I always French plait my hair the night before then it stays in place for the whole race (if you do this make sure you adjust your helmet to fit hair without a bobble in advance)

Sleep well :) 

Race day!

Once you are there, register, put your stickers on your bike and helmet, then head over to transition. 

Transition set up 
I have: a small hand towel and fold it in half next to the front wheel of my bike. On it: 
1. clip on shoes, with socks already inside each shoe (if you don’t use clip ons don’t worry, i didn’t for my first race I just wore trainers), put some talc inside both trainers and inside both socks- helps getting them on. 
2. Put your bib number on the number belt if the race uses them (some just write your number in permanent pen on you). You clip it on after your swim with the bib on your back for the bike, and turn it around to be on your front for the run (I didn’t for my first Tri and they shouted at me!). Undo belt and lie it down on top of your trainers in transition.
3. Cycle jacket and gloves if you wear them (even if it’s a nice forecast I put one down and then just leave it there if I don’t need to wear it!)
4. Trainers- don’t change your socks so you just need a little talc in these. 
5. Most importantly- helmet- balance it on your bike bars if you can, if you can’t, on top of your bike shoes facing upwards with the straps Un- clipped and sunglasses open inside. That’s it for bike set up! 
6. The flip flops or old trainers are to wear for the briefing and wandering around now until the race starts. I tend to have a snack and go to the loo in this time.

Racing

Race: 
Swim, take it nice and easy, don’t panic if goggles leak just breast stroke or stop at the end of a lane and adjust :) if people tap your toes, let them past and just go slow and enjoy it! 

T1- jog out the area slowly. Helmet on FIRST! Then other things. Take your time to get dry and think about what you need. 

Cycle- don’t worry if you have a rubbish bike- I did too at first. You can feel smug when you overtake some of the posh bikes. I only invested in a road bike after 1 full season of triathlons when I decided I was addicted :). Check your tyres are pumped up in advance and carry stuff for a puncture. Again- take it easy and smile at all the marshals. Maybe take a snack for when on the bike?! Breakfast bar or gel? Depends how long you usually go without food! You can put these in a little zippy bag on your bike. 

T2: almost there! If you’re in a Tri suit then this is easy as you just dump the bike and get going. Take off cycle jacket if wearing one. 

Run: start SLOW!!! Most people start this too quickly and it’s super tough going from bike to run on your legs, so force yourself to really slow down for the first mile, then if you’re feeling good you can pick it up after that. 

Finish line: look up at the finish line, plaster the biggest grin on your face and throw your arms in the air! A triathlon of any distance is a logistical challenge, and the first one can be quite daunting- I know I was petrified!!! 

Think of the feeling at the finish line- this was my second triathlon, still with the CX bike!

Persuading pals to come and race with you too is a good motivator and lots of fun!

As is having a solid support crew (especially for the longer distances)

3 years later...

One of the highlights of my life so far.

..The time I did an IRONMAN!!

An Ironman?

Throwback to 2016 when I was walking the West Highland Way with three friends. I met a woman walking it on her own wearing a buff with ‘Ironman’ on it. I asked her what an 'Ironman' was, and felt inspired by her story. Although I have very little recollection of this conversation, my friend Nadine tells me my ears pricked up, and she knew that this was the start of a new adventure for me.

Skip to January 2017 and I decided I wanted to do an Ironman. I’m not one to go halfheartedly into an activity! My boyfriend, Phil, thought it was a huge undertaking and suggested I maybe try a middle distance first, and see how I get on (very sensible!). Fast forward to June 2017, I had 2 seasons of triathlons under my belt: 4 sprints (Borders series) 1 standard (Gullane) and built up to 1 middle distance (Grafman- time 5h30 with a shortened swim). I followed Don Finks full Ironman plan for this and read both of Chrissie Wellingtons books back to back, taking it all in. By then I felt confident I could cope with the high levels of training and decided 2018 would be my year for the full.

First Middle Distance May 2017 

Which one?

I knew a sea swim wasn't for me after the huge waves I experienced at Gullane so I narrowed my search down to lake swims. I then thought about timing; as a teacher I have six weeks summer holidays. I wanted a race that was near the beginning of the holidays so I had time to relax and recover after it. Ironman Frankfurt, 8th July 2018 seemed to tick all of those boxes.

Steps to Success.

Step 1: Telling my family and friends and getting their support was important to me, so that’s the first thing I did. Because I had already tested the water with a middle distance I had full support from them all, and had to regularly repeat the distances, even if only to receive looks of absolute shock. 3.8km swim, 180km cycle, 42km run- say whaaaat?!! In one day? You’re CRAZY.

Step 2: Getting coached by Karl was something I knew I wanted to do. We had a trial run when he took me though Dublin Marathon training to get a PB (3h38), and I knew that self doubt and my eagerness to say yes to every activity could lead me to over training and panicking. So I committed to following his plan, starting January 1st 2018.

The Training.

I promised myself I would always try to enjoy the training journey, just incase anything didn’t work out on race day- it is too much time and money to invest to have any regrets.

So I set off on my training with nothing but enthusiasm and I have to say I loved almost all of it. I loved the structured swim sessions Karl gave me, it meant I always had a focus and could feel definite improvements.

Example swim session on Training Peaks 

I also loved joining my local cycle group, Fietsclub, meeting some incredibly strong cyclists seeing my improvements as I struggled to keep up with them in January. By the time we did the 100 mile sportive in June, I was able to hold a steady pace for a long time, chasing those yellow cycle jerseys ahead of me.

I actually found finding pals to keep me company on the longer cycles my biggest challenge. It’s hard not to get bored/ lonely after 4 hours! Met some lovely folk from Ronde and Edinburgh Triathletes- so thank you to them, as well as my own club Pentland Triathletes, for keeping me motivated. Especially Frank who gave up plenty of his own time to help me learn the basics: using a turbo (useful with all the snow this year!), changing a tyre, buying new tyres, and making sure I had everything I could possibly need if I had a mechanical on race day. Thank you Frank!

Cycling no matter the weather- beautiful but FREEZING! 

The Build up to Race Day.

Meeting up with Karl before the race with my giant list of questions really helped settle my nerves. And he was great at quashing self doubt too, which is wasted energy so thank you for that too. I felt well prepared when it came to race day.
The build up was INSANE. We arrived in Frankfurt on Wednesday evening and I loved buying the branded gear at the expo and wore it with pride on the race build up, feeling part of a secret group 😊

Looking at all of the fancy bikes 

Getting all the gear at the expo 

Having my family out there to support also helped keep me calm and distracted pre-race. We managed a trip to the theatre and a boat ride along the river in the build up! Thank you Mum, Dad, Matthew, Debi and Phil- you were all amazing and made the whole experience so memorable.

Found it! 

Lots of logistics getting the transition bags ready 

Race Day.

Race day started with a 3am alarm. Hair was braided and tattoos on the night before. I actually managed to sleep ok until about 2.30, I have all the yoga and meditation to thank for that. After a breakfast of porridge and coffee (my lovely self catered apartment Adina was ideal for this), we got the first shuttle bus at 4am to Lake Waldersee.

I found the swim absolutely magical. The sun rising, the intense build up of what was about to happen. A huge sea of blue hats, interspersed with a few pink ones (only 10% of Triathletes were women). When I looked around and tried to take in the enormity of it all I got choked up, so I tried to just look out at those gorgeous turquoise waters, and breathe deeply. My game plan was to go into a pen a little faster than I predicted, so I stood in 1-1h10 pen. I took off to the far right straight away to avoid the crowds and decided I would rather not be hit on the head by other swimmers, and would rather swim further if needs be to stay in the calmer waters at the edges. This worked perfectly and I felt like I was swimming alone the whole time. When looking at my route on strava later, I actually didn’t swim further and managed a steady 1h10 which I’m delighted with and felt very comfortable.

Quickly out of the water and into T1, I put on my helmet and shoes and grabbed my bike. Off I went!

One poor soul had a puncture within the first 100 metres out of transition, and the race Marshals were hot on people’s toes for drafting. I decided pretty early on that I did not want a puncture, or a yellow or red card. So I took care to slow down on bumpy roads and let people over take when they wanted to. I smiled at each race marshal as well as each spectator, and said thank you to as many as I could. Smiling kept me in the zone, and reminded me- I GET to do this!

One of two bike loops done (~100km), and I was in a rhythm. Eat, drink, cycle. Overtaken by all the speedy bikes on the flat (I was what felt like the ONLY person on a road bike), but i really enjoyed overtaking all of those speedy blokes on the uphill! (This got lots of cheers and woops from the crowds).

From kilometre 130 onwards, things started to get a little tougher. I was starting to tire, and I got really numb toes which were getting more and more painful. The flat sections had a headwind, so I felt like there was no break. However I got another lease of energy at around 160km, as I knew it wasn’t long left and the thought of seeing my family spurred me on.

Into T2. I spotted my whole grinning family straight away- I felt like a celeb with all of the paparazzi capturing the really exciting moment when I changed my shoes and massaged my toes 😂. Starting the run was an actual dream after being on the bike for so long, I love to run and was happy to feel the blood in my toes again.

Karl recommended I try to run slower than 5.30min/km, so I kept check on my pace and stuck to that. I walked through every aid station and took on water, soaked my cap, and put an ice sponge down my top. All things that felt unnecessary at the beginning, but really paid off as the time went on. Really unfortunately, my belly was not 100% so I needed to stop and use the portaloo (gross!) 3 times on the run, but I took it in my stride, took it as a little rest break, and tried to stick to my pace when back in the game. 

Run route along the river

Just past Kilometre 32 was a mental challenge for me, as I was relieved I only had 10km to go, but my quads were really starting to tighten, and the 10km wasn’t coming round quick enough. I slowed at this point, and the splits for the second half were slower than the first. That last lap was the first time in the race when I struggled to smile each time I passed my family, but I just knew as long as I kept jogging, then walking through the aid stations, the finish line would soon be in sight.

This was a great race for pacing; 4 loops and a flat course meant mentally I could break it down and I can safely say that I didn’t hit a ‘wall’ or ever consider stopping to walk aside from the water stations. The volunteers were all amazing, offering all sorts to eat and drink and were constantly shouting my name (it was on my bib).

That last 5km felt tough, but the final 200m was AMAZING. I felt a final surge of adrenaline, turned the final corner, gave a high 5 to the team leader on the finish line, saw my family grinning and screaming like crazy people: first my mum and brother, Dad and Debi, then finally, just as I hit the red carpet, Phil. About 20 meters to go. I took my cap off, had the widest grin you can imagine, and I sprinted. Pain surging through
My quads reminding me that I have an incredible powerful body that enabled me to do this event.

“Jennifer- YOU ARE AN IRONMAN!!!”

Looking back that final stretch is a complete blur. Did I actually do that?! The photos capture my emotion in the last few seconds. Once over, I was so keen to hold my (giant!) medal and hug my support crew.

My absolute world- What a team! 

Afterwards.

I’m writing this on a sun lounger in Spain. After the race I took a cheap flight straight to Mallorca- a week of sunbathing, eating and drinking cocktails has given me the space to recover well and reflect on this journey I have been on since January. I’m the strongest and fittest I have ever been and I feel so proud of myself and everything I have managed to achieve. A regular sufferer of S.A.D (seasonal affective disorder), this was my first winter with no winter blues and high motivation to go out and train no matter the weather. I can’t believe I did it, and with such a grin on my face, but as they say...

...anything is possible.

The future?
Who knows. I think that this is only the beginning. I would like to do a few more middle distance triathlons and try to increase my speed, maybe invest in a more aero Tri bike, and see what I can achieve. Another Ironman? Probably. Not next year though. I need some time to just celebrate what my body has achieved and work on race skill, confidence and speed. I think I could go sub 12h with a bit of practice and a few more brick sessions so will see 😜
Thank you body. Thank you mind. Thank you family. Thank you friends.

x